Money Number One Updated 2012 Edition

A Fool In Paradise

A Fool In Paradise

Geld Nummer Eins

Geld Nummer Eins

Tokstollen Artill Baka

Tokstollen Artill Baka

Who is Neil Hutchison?

A Short Biography of Money Number One

Man, Neil Hutchison.

neil hutchison

Neil Hutchison

I think everyone has an imaginary visualization of someone they’ve either spoken to on the phone or heard about which in 99% of cases turns out completely wrong and this was the case when I first met Neil Hutchison.

I had purchased and read all the Neil Hutchison books prior to our meeting in Pattaya Thailand and was curious as to learn what sort of a person could write such humorous stories and so, set out on a quest to track him down.

It wasn’t as difficult as I had imagined because one of the owners of a popular Aussie bar I got chatting to one night aptly named “The Boxing Roo Bar” on third road, happened to be a mate of Neil’s, and halfway through my eighth or fourteenth beer while amicably chatting about Neil Hutchison, he looked up and said “Here is is now”.

True to the lore, Neil Hutchison looked nothing like I expected him to and on turning around saw a jovial looking gentleman of average height and of rather stout proportions approaching us while desperately trying to wheedle his way through the four or five giggling bar girls who seemed to have glued themselves to various parts of Neil’s body while he was valiantly tying to unglue them without actually causing them any physical harm.

Neil Hutchison from Bachelor of Science

to Money Number One

The following is his story:

Born of poor but humble parents in the former British colony of Australia, Neil Hutchison spent his early years trudging barefoot through six miles of crocodile-infested wasteland getting to and from school every day. There was another school right next door to his humble home but his parents decided the exercise would do him good.

Eventually he was sent to board at an all-boys Grammar School, which kind of explains his adult infatuation with women. Following that, it became a long slog at Queensland University to be rewarded with a Bachelor of Science degree in chemistry. That was the mid nineteen-seventies, the time of sex, drugs, Rock ’n Roll and a fashion statement that will hopefully never be repeated. Neil missed out on the sex, avoided almost all the drugs, loved Rock ’n Roll and became the fashion guru of flared trousers and wide psychedelic neckties.
“I remember when Meatloaf’s Bat Out Of Hell album came out. I played it at my 21st birthday party and knew all the moves to ‘Time Warp’.”

Pathetic, isn’t it?

Neil Hutchison’s early adult life was unremarkable, and it just went downhill from there. Careers were wide, varied and had nothing to do with chemistry.
“Getting that degree turned out to be a total waste of time, except for the fun I had at uni.”
His marriage began well and produced three wonderful children but, after ten years, the union began to disintegrate. Fearing total nuclear meltdown, he did what he was destined to do; he ran away.
He spent a year living in Hong Kong before moving to Manila, Philippines, where he spent a further two years learning the tricks and secrets of the poor, huddled masses. Neil concurred with Dwight D Eisenhower, who

neil hutchison

Neil Hutchison arrives in Pattaya

served as chief military aide to General Douglas MacArthur in the Philippines from 1935 to 1939, and later wrote that he, “learned to expect a maximum of promise and a minimum of performance” from Filipinos.
It wasn’t until after he hit rock bottom, standing alone in the pouring rain on a congested Manila street trying to avoid the attention of homicidal jeepney drivers, that fortune smiled and led him to Thailand. Soon after arriving in Bangkok and being informed by his good friend, host and guide that they were going to Pattaya, Neil uttered those immortal words, “Where’s that?”

Neil Hutchison Discovers Pattaya.

In Pattaya, Neil Hutchison found the most interesting people, the best food and the most beautiful women he had ever seen. He posed the standard questions: “How long has this been going on?” and “Why wasn’t I told about this place?” He quickly fell in love with a local working lass and saved her from a life of immorality. Or so he thought. When he eventually confronted her with being less than forthright with him, she reacted to his

neil Hutchison

Lie Detector

anger with a smile and the words that still reverberate in his ears today: “Money Number One!”
He began taking notes of his experiences and listening to the tales and advice of others. What followed was a long, slow and sometimes costly learning experience which, even after a decade, is still a work in progress. He found an Australian publisher willing to take a chance on publishing his advice, tips and anecdotes collated into a book bearing the message his first girlfriend had burned into his brain.
For Neil Hutchison, every day spent in Pattaya held the opportunity for a new experience or new lesson to learn and more stories followed. With eventually enough material for a second book, it was published under the title that epitomized the way Neil saw himself: “A Fool in Paradise“. And for Neil Hutchison, the rest as they say, is history.

One of the dilemma facing regular travelers is finding a quick solution to the common problem of where to find free internet providers throughout Asia or anywhere else.

While it might be OK to just go out and buy the local 3G wireless USB if you intend staying for some time,  going to the expense of doing do for a short stopover makes no sense.

As a frequent traveler myself I’ve often been faced with the dilemma and while there’s a  reasonable chance of finding an internet cafe within walking distance of most hotels in major cites, if you can’t speak the language it’s not just a matter of asking the closest person who appears to be a local, which way to go.

It’s a question I’m regularly asked so I’ve done a little digging around and come up with a very useful directory which will show not only exactly where to find free internet providers throughout Asia but also anywhere in the world you might be.

Of course there’s always the possibility that the location you find will have it’s faults such as a dysfunctional or slow machine but once having found one location by using the directory, you can use it again on that machine to find another location. Just save the URL in one of your email folders.

Find Free Internet Providers in Thailand

Your Feedback Here

If you’d like to make a comment on anything at all to do with Thailand or leave some feedback on the books or any other product found on this site, could you please do so here.

Some of the best comments we’ve had over the years have come from the girlfriends of readers so don’t be shy ladies.

If you can’t read and write English very well, just ask your boyfriend to write what you think.

Have some fun and get your thoughts on the internet.